Rehab Therapist : Sir you’re unauthorised to be here. What is your name?
Peter Mind voice : I will lie by not saying my real name and I will escape. Searching the room for clues. Sees a pea,a tear and a griffin flying
Peter : My name is Peter Griffin.
Rehab Therapist : I’m keeping my eye on you.
Peter : Damn it.
Welcome everyone today I’m going to talk about the family guy who should have never had a family in the first place. He doesn’t have a thought filter which allows him to say anything that he wants sometimes even the gruesome things. He will also get away with those remarks because technically he is retarded. Pretty much we are going to discuss the level of craziness that Peter brings into the world. Let’s go
He would have a loving and caring family and how he got it is still a mystery. He would fall in love with a rich and bored Lois who would want something exciting to thrill her,that would be Peter and eventually that thrill would turn into sex and then kids. So they would be forced to start a family. After a while the thrill would go off and the marriage would fall apart. To save that they will have two more kids. He will also have a dog which he would rescue from the roads. That’s the Peter family in a nutshell. Nothing too fancy.
Peter would have 3 best friends, Cleveland, Joe and Quagmire. They would cause nothing but riot in the city. Drinking,making jokes and disrespecting women would be the main aspect of their friendship. However the writers would have shown amazing skills to make each of them unique in the show. Peter would be the head of the group and I don’t know why but that just makes it so much more fun. Their foolish endeavors would make you laugh all the time. Peter’s idea of opening up a sensuous massage place would end in disaster.
Peter and Friends : This sensuous massage place will calm your body down.
Random Women : Yeah this what I want after a hard day getting rubbed down by a fat guy, a cripple, a pervert and a black man.
Cleveland : Now we have no money and our feelings are hurt.
This one is tough just because of the number of jobs that Peter would have throughout the show. At first he will be a toy factory worker arranging toys where he would accidentally cause his boss’s demise which will make him jobless. After that he will try to be a fisherman,a storm and disappearance for several months will take care of that. Finally he will work in a place that would be suitable for his talents. He would get a job in the brewery but he would get instantly de-promoted because he will break the rules by drinking on the job. So he still works there but he has had several side business and part-time jobs.
You might think with all these jobs Peter would be rich or he might be able to afford education for his kids but no it would all be spent on his stupid and wild endeavors. Like rebuilding his house to have a giant stairways or destroying half the city’s property fighting with the yellow chicken. The handyman would be a regular visit to the Griffin’s house just to fix. He would also spend the money on wild transportation’s which would only be used to kill Joe’s garden. There are several other endeavors that will make you laugh out loud. Watch the show to know more about them.
He is the retard that no one wants to meet or know on a personal level and these quotes will give you a clearer picture. “Love is like a fart. If you have to force it. It’s provably crap” or when he was asked to tell a joke by a women “Why do women have boobs? So you got something to look at while you’re talking to them”. A joke which would land him in so much trouble. There are several other jokes like this one and more quotes from Peter. So don’t miss them
He would force to take a genius test after his victory in a game of trivial pursuit where he would be asked kindergarten questions by Lois. After the results it would be proved that he would be a retard. A thing that we would have known from the start of the show. However he won’t be disappointed with the outcome.
Peter in a fast food restaurant : I got the mike,dear customers “Testicles” that is all!!.
Lois : Give me that. Sorry folks (Admiring her own voice).
Peter : Is that the frying machine. I’m gonna take that. Slips up and throws it on Lois.
Lois : Aah!!!
This article pretty much sums up the life of Peter but you can find a lot of other instances that I have missed out on. Comment down below about all the instances that you found Peter funny and retarded.